


Rubeus Hagrid

by Elsepth



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling, Shia LaBeouf - Rob Cantor (Song)
Genre: Absolutely Wizard, Alternate Universe - Crack, Gen, Hagrid's Crossbow, Hogwarts Forbidden Forest, Order of Merlin, POV Second Person, Poetry, Song Parody, Vanishing The Bodies, Wizards
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-05-08
Updated: 2020-05-08
Packaged: 2021-03-02 21:47:43
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 128
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24073939
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Elsepth/pseuds/Elsepth
Summary: Yer a wizard, Hagrid.
Comments: 2
Kudos: 5





	Rubeus Hagrid

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [Shia LaBeouf](https://archiveofourown.org/external_works/617773) by Rob Cantor. 



You're walking in the Forbidden Forest

There's no one around and your wand is dead

Out of the corner of your eye you spot him:

Rubeus Hagrid

He's following you, about 30 feet back

He gets out his crossbow and breaks into a sprint

He's gaining on you

Rubeus Hagrid

You're looking for your broom but you're all turned around

He's almost upon you now

and you can see there's a small frown on his face

By Merlin, there's a frown on his face!

Running for your life (from Rubeus Hagrid)

He's brandishing a wand (It's Rubeus Hagrid)

Lurking in the shadows

Three times Order of Merlin holder Rubeus Hagrid

Living in the forest (Rubeus Hagrid)

Killing Death Eaters (Rubeus Hagrid)

Vanishing the bodies

**Actual Wizard Rubeus Hagrid**


End file.
